October 16th, 2006

Clippy

Contemplating the Indigo

Hi, I’m Susan. I’m 21 and in college. I recently came into contact with new age “stuff” and am wondering about it.


My first encounter with it was through my therapist on campus. I usually hate therapy, but this woman is amazing. She started to do Reiki on me during my first visit and has done it a few times after. I felt a lot during those sessions—it wasn’t just because I wanted to, but I really did. I do it with my eyes closed because I feel more focused that way. One day when she was performing Reiki, I shut my eyes and saw the usual spasms of “fireworks” (or whatever the technical name for them is) racing all through my field of vision. This is due to the intensity of my thoughts and lack of concentration. As she waved her hands over my head doing whatever she was with energies, I started to see an eye looking back at me. It wasn’t too detailed, but I knew it was an eye…a single eye. Then all of a sudden, little purple squiggly lines appeared snaking all through my field of vision like a lava lamp. I couldn’t see any other color except that color. I didn’t tell my therapist because I didn’t want her to think I was making it up though I know she’d trust me.


Anyway, I saw her last Friday but didn’t do any Reiki. Instead, we were talking about my past and then we got into how I never feel like I fit in. I don’t WANT to fit in, I just want to have at least one person I can identify with. I told her how I feel the pain of everyone around me and it becomes too much of a burden sometimes. She responded that it’s because I’m an Indigo child. I wasn’t familiar with this term much. She told me to research it and I did. I had already been researching chakras and the like, so it interested me more so. I don’t know how you “assess” who is an indigo and who isn’t since I saw that someone posted that everyone thinks they are one. All I know is that what I read and several detailed quizzes I took on auras pointed me in the direction of feeling like I could identify with the indigos. That’s why I’m here: to figure out how other people feel about it and to talk about it. Admittedly, I’ve also been very depressed lately and have been trying to figure out what to do. That’s why I initially started to see the therapist. I was diagnosed with type II bipolar disorder 2 years ago and this year, some professors suspect I have ADHD. I really like school and can do the work; I just get bored and distracted and feel that most of it is menial. I’m seeking some answers or at least some support. I have pretty strong self-awareness, I just feel alone and can’t seem to find common ground even though I’ve tried many times.

 

Anyway, sorry for the sleuth of info. I just want to have a discussion with people who are seemingly like-minded ;)